This afternoon I was at a new years drinkies party. In effect it is a networking event. You know the kind where you go; “I don’t know anybody” and “does my hair go silly” or “do I have something stuck to my teeth”? The one where you can feel all rocks in the world in your shoes and when you look around the room there seems to be a wall of grey and blue suits that know each other very well. Yep those are really scary ones and this one was quite high on the scale.
However I had fun, very good fun and a lot of laughter. These specific people always have a speaker and this years speaker was really really good. Highly entertaining and he made sense. A great combination. He also had a topic that he brought in a slightly controversial way. There is nothing like a slightly controversial speaker to get a networking meeting going. After all what did you think of him? With that there there is the immediate safe topic as an opening sentence.
Personally I really dread going to these parties, yet once I am there I seem to be a natural at them (so I am told). Before I go I find all kinds of reasons why it is going to be an utter disaster. Nobody will like, nobody will want to talk to me, I’ll be a wallflower etc. Then I think of how tired I will be, as people and interaction like this are an energy leak. After all I am an introvert, that can act like and extrovert, but it does take concentration and energy. By the time I have gone through my whole thought process I decided that I don’t want to go. Once I have admitted that to myself, that is when my bossy me comes out.
The bossy me tells me that though I dread them I usually enjoy them. She tells me that this is what I am good at, if I want to be, finding people, making an network, being a spider in the web. She is the one that pulls me off my chair, pushes the adrenaline pump and kicks me in the ass. She is my get up and go, my willpower. And she is used to getting her way.
With this meeting she was right again. I talked to some interesting (and uninteresting people) managed to link two projects together and used and contact of a contact to find stuff out and get an invitation to come and talk. It was fun, but after about an hour and a half of working the room I was dog tired and went home. So here I am now. Calming down with a splitting headache but feeling sooo smug that I did listen to the bossy me and that I did it.
But no doubt I will be dreading the next event again. I find it an odd contradiction within myself that I dread something that people say I am really good at. You’d think that the hurdle to do it is lowered every time, but it isn’t. Still I’ll keep climbing over it and so my best. Bossy me is just the one in charge in the end 🙂